Monday, November 5, 2007

ones self

I'm a lot to handle, I realize that. Really you don't have to tell me. I get it. I however take it as a good thing, I am my own person and for the most part I don't give a fuck what you think about me. That is until you make me question myself. My first roommate threatened to stab me last year, this lady spat in my face over the summer, my mom loves to remind me that these type of things don't happen to normal people, that it's just me. A month or so ago I was talking to a friends of mine and he told me that to make it in Hollywood (which is what i want) you have to be able to and I quote "Kill a cat and say 'I did that'" lol I wouldn't kill a cat but I have no problem confessing to what I've done. He said it was more or less the same thing. People in my hall way seem to think I'm a heartless bitch when in all reality I don't intend to come off as such, I just am who I am. Hell even my roommates pissed off at me now, not that I'm all the concerned about it. I've asked the opinons of those who live around me and they say that they think I am so cold and heartless that I will end up alone. I hate that thought. I don't want to end up alone. So is this what a person gets for finally learning how to be themselves? Shut down?

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